How to Lose Your Offer of Admission
/So you got accepted to your dream school with a great scholarship. Your parents are bragging and your classmates are envious. But you don't actually want to go, do you?
You're in luck. With the right combination of laziness and misbehavior, you can have the admissions offer revoked. Then they won't let you attend class in the fall for any amount of money or begging. How can you get that acceptance letter shredded?
Senioritis
This disease is no doubt becoming quite common at your high school. Students who have worked very hard to get into college feel they can take the last semester off and skid their way into higher education. Yet if they slack too hard, they may find their chosen school doesn't want them anymore.
It's important to finish what you started. An admissions letter is contingent on maintaining the academic performance you demonstrated when you applied. A single bad grade could put your offer in jeopardy. If you do feel an F, D or even a C coming on, contact your future institution with an explanation and hope they buy it.
Getting in Trouble
If you want your college to dump you like an ugly boyfriend, all you need to do is get busted for something. As a bonus, your parents will be mad too. Drive drunk, get caught with drugs or steal something. One tiny little arrest could be your ticket to years of freedom from study. You could also end up with a great minimum wage job in the fall.
Colleges dislike petty crimes, but what they truly loathe is academic dishonesty. Nothing will get you revoked faster than cheating in class. Suddenly your former new school will distrust every grade you've ever been given. They'll treat you like an unwanted puppy for sure.
Plagiarism
Fortunately for you, it's never been easier to get caught stealing another's writing. Next time you're assigned an essay, just cut and paste from the internet. Feel free to steal anything I've written. Once you've patched together an introduction, body and conclusion sourced from Google, your teacher will scan it into plagiarism software and the sirens will start to wail.
You can even plagiarize your admissions essay if you want to save time. Of course colleges test those, too. Your entire senior class can share one essay and send it to everyone. Admissions counsellors will compare the results and dismiss all of you.
If you don't want this to happen, be careful where you share your essay. If you publish it on social media, someone you don't even know could copy it, leading to some awkward discussions with your chosen school.
Social Media
Speaking of sharing, be wary of what you post. The world wide web is, of course, world wide. Your future alma mater probably has internet access. Share pictures, videos or stories of criminal behavior, cheating or dishonesty and you could get yanked.
Cameras are everywhere. They even have cameras that can make phone calls. If you are doing it, someone can capture it and post it. You might as well consider your entire life to be online, so don't try to hide from anyone. If you don't share it, someone else will and tag you.
Don't Commit
The easiest way to not go to college it the fall is to simply not sign a letter of commitment and send your deposit. Just ignore it and dance your way through the summer to a class-free autumn. The school that offered you a spot will perceive that you are not interested and will give your desk to someone who wants it.
Don't think that this doesn't happen. Every year students fail to properly accept an admissions offer and lose their place in school.
You Can Do It
Getting an admissions offer revoked isn't easy, but I believe in you. Yet, if you do actually want to go to the college that offered you a chance to earn a degree, ignore the previous advice. In fact, you should probably do the opposite.
Keep your grades up. Continue to exercise your study muscles. Stay out of trouble. Don't cheat. Don't steal writing. Don't post pictures of yourself vandalizing the principal's car.
And make sure to sign your letter of commitment and pay your deposit. Then you can actually attend the college you worked so hard to get into.
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